"Truth be known, we are always in the state of recovery. Sometimes it's quite obvious & other times it's barely discernable, but it is recovery never the less"... Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
Two weeks ago I fell off the top of my desk while changing a cartridge in my fax......a rather silly thing....OH put down the silly word.... I'm not about to hide behind myself.....it was a rather stupid thing to do. As a result of this extremely bad moment of judgment, my life took quite a few turns, some more major than others. I couldn't walk, I couldn't put weight on my left leg, I couldn't stand, I couldn't sit, I couldn't lie down.
It was quite amazing to have absolutely no where to go to experience even a moments relief. And so, I couldn't go to work, nor cook or do anything else. On a somewhat lesser note, I became "unblogged" which may sound like a small thing, but it was not. Writing my blog is part of my life, perhaps not one that sustains me in any financial way, but it is meaningful never the less.
My life changed in many ways over the past two weeks. I'm a different person now. Accidents change people. Active recovery changes people. Nothing about it is fun, nor would I care to repeat any of it. HOWEVER, it has been an excellent learning experience & in a way, I'm a better person for falling off my desk.
I'm now out of the acute phase & into what is known as recovery.. Recovery is an interesting word. Truth be known, we are always involved in recovery. Either we are recovering actively from something, or we are involved in designing a recovery plan for some part of our work or life. As a nursing administrator I've worked on many potential disaster or recovery committees. As a wife & mother, I do the same at home.
Recovery begins long before any episode that may or may not happen. We have a ongoing mind folder that is labeled disaster plan or recovery plan. Some of us do understand this folder very well, perhaps because we have actually lived through disasters & found the weaknesses in our programs. Those weaknesses became our motivators.....we listened well, accepted our errors & became creative in not only correcting, but making things much better than before. In case you are wondering, I now have a mind folder for changing the ink jet in my fax machine. To be sure, the plan is very different from the one I carried out.
It does help to make mistakes. This is how we get better, but. some lessons are definitely harder than others. The people in who were hit by Katrina & now Rita know plenty about this. When all is said & done, these people will be very different in many ways. Children become adults overnight, seeing & experiencing things that are not meant for their eyes or psyches. Trust is lost, perhaps never to be gained again. Laughter, abandonment & pure joy will be more difficult to find & perhaps feeling wrong for a very long time. This is all part of the grieving process, some of which will never end.
So, what do we do in order to find & accept a new normal? If you have faith in a Higher Power, turn to that for solace, as well as for direction & motivation to get moving again. Take your mountainous problems & break them into smaller, more manageable pieces. For me, it is one baby step at a time.
I must put my old life on a back burner & work towards my new normal, knowing that once I've achieved that, then I'll be ready to go up a few pegs, hopefully nearer to my old normal OR even better. I stop moaning about what I can't do & do what I can. I trust in my body. I've taken good care of it for a very long time & now is the time to reap the benefits of that work. If you are not caring for yourself at optimum levels, begin today. You never know when you might do something stupid without thinking. Work on paying attention to what you do. We are all vulnerable.
Don't let the levies remain weak. I was just listening to the news about the levies in Galveston & I couldn't believe my ears. Some of them are cracked & very vulnerable! How could this have been ignored. Hurricanes happen.........accidents happen! Be prepared. Take good care of yourself & your environment. Fight, fight, fight. Don't be a quiet observer. You may live to regret it. Once you fall off the desk, the rest is history. Lucky for me my levies were in good condition from years of excellent self-maintenance. Yes, I'm injured, but I'm going to recover & hopefully to be much better than before.
Victims usually don't happen overnight. Take time today to check in on yourself. Where are you weak? What do you need to do? What will you do today? Do it now.
Friday, December 28, 2007
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Beginning Again....& Then Again
"Begin. To have commenced is half the deed. Half yet remains; Begin again on this and thou wilt finish all"...Ausonius
Everything is in process. I put things down & I pick things up. I enjoy the act of beginning again. ...Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
Related SpokenWords, Emotional States & MindSets - resume, continue, pick up, reopen, recommence, renew, reopen, take up
It's the holiday season & not the time when most people want to think about finishing what's been started or starting what needs to be finished. While the New Year is touted for resolution-setting, the idea of making resolutions has lost it's popularity, probably because everyone is sick & tired of hearing about losing weight, exercising, stopping smoking or whatever needs to be addressed. Right now my private practice is very quiet, but come the 1st of the year, many will lift their weary heads from their sleeping pillows & stumble into my office.
Personally, I like beginning again. In fact, I tend to practice "beginning" just about every day. There is really no need for a new resolution. It's more like an ongoing personal cleaning up or clearing out. If I look carefully, underneath the disorder I can sense my desire & willingness to pick up where I left off.
Through the years I've been able to set a gentler, friendlier restart button. Perhaps it's because I avoid the resolution word & hype, so the fear of being criticized for failure or not achieving is less. After all, it's not a resolution or anything. It's simply something that was left unfinished & perhaps no one will even notice that I've restarted whatever it is.
Truth be known, very little gets finished in life.... at least in my life. For me that includes managing my weight, minimizing my pile of magazines, completing my writing assignments, my love for icing, or having my home dust free & the bathrooms completely clean. I'm so glad to know this because then now I can stop efforting & striving over so many things. Perhaps I can even begin enjoying them.
It's easy to see why I had spent a good part of my previous life bogged down, almost to the point of burnout. With my new definition, I am free to simply relax, picking up any challenge where I left it untended, no longer racked by shame or guilt. No need to hide anymore, from myself or the judging eyes of others. What a relief !
As a clinical hypnotherapist & writer, I'm geared to thinking within hypnotic metaphor. Here are some areas in my mind that had something to say to me this morning...
1. It's a good idea to put some things down for awhile. As I mentally walked through the areas of my life, noticing what was left unattended, I couldn't help but notice that some areas were doing better on their own since I left them alone. I'm not surprised, acknowledging that I have a tendency to beat things to death, or smother them with attention if they are not responding in the way I think best. Sometimes I can become breathless in the process, even if there is no aerobic activity involved. Talk about efforting !
2. There are 24 hours in a day & that includes eight that should be dedicated to sleep. No one gets more or less. I'm just like anyone else with owning too much to do. On the days I can't breathe I know I'm in trouble. For some deep & hidden reason, this a big learning curve for me.
I have some ideas about why this is, but what is truly important is waking up to it & getting practical. I don't have to look far to know what has to go. It's vital for me to be ruthless in my clearing & cleaning, not just with my possessions, but with the intangibles as well. This is never easy, but it is incredibly rewarding. Even throwing away socks with holes can seem like a break-through moment.
3. Choosing what is truly important to me can focus my mind. Just like cleaning & clearing is vital, so is deciding on exactly what I want. It's amazing that we can have so much of so many things & still not have what we want. How does this happen? For me, it's always been about not clearly defining what I want. In order to do this, it's necessary to truly slow down, to clear, to be still & then to begin to define. When I work with myself I utilize automatic writing. For my patients, it's easy to go into the workshop of the mind with guided imagery, enter the metaphor, perhaps shopping for the details. In both scenarios, the subconscious mind joins in the creative goal building & then sets a plan of action.
4. I can always be healthier. Eating correctly for my body needs, excercising, managing my addictions & a host of other areas can all benefit from beginning again. Exploring ways to do this always triggers additional areas to present themselves. This morning I was having a look at my nutritional areas when I heard from my skin department. When we become purposefully still, either in meditation, hypnosis or automatic writing, the messages begin to flow, but never in a way of becoming overwhelmed. The subconscious mind understands the need for balance or homeostasis & takes one towards that. If anxiety is in the way, it simply means that you have to release & go deeper down to pass that obstruction.
5. I don't have to be perfect. I just need to be present. Growing up in a critical household, I developed many automatic mind programs about the need for perfection. This was one of many that kept me locked in my personal prison for decades. For me, it is very important to begin the mangement of these automatic programs over & over again. This is how they weaken or diminish. Some of mine that could do with some refreshing or clear eyes include approval seeking & self-doubting. Do I have others? Of course I do. I'm human. But, once again the subconscious mind is kind & prefers balance. When we take the initiative to work in one area, the others will simply follow suit.
So, enjoy all the holidays....a perfect time for reflection & an opportunity to wake-up & enjoy the fresh air that surrounds new beginnings.
FROM THE AUTHOR
To help you along, here's a sample mp3 of a very popular program that I've written, recorded & produced called Affirmations for Inner Winning. This will give you a head start in working with your own subconscious mind in many new ways. This particular mp3 or CD has three tracks or sessions. You can order the entire program on my website.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Offerings for Publishers, Editors & Agents
Beyond Disorderly Eating...The Truth About Sugar & Bingeing & How to Stop
mindSCRABBLE...The Game of Programming Your Mind for What You Want
It's Time to Stop...Nail Biting - Book & Interactive Self-Hypnosis CD
Winning the Mind Game - A Total Sports Advantage - Book & Interactive Self-Hypnosis CD
Everything is in process. I put things down & I pick things up. I enjoy the act of beginning again. ...Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
Related SpokenWords, Emotional States & MindSets - resume, continue, pick up, reopen, recommence, renew, reopen, take up
It's the holiday season & not the time when most people want to think about finishing what's been started or starting what needs to be finished. While the New Year is touted for resolution-setting, the idea of making resolutions has lost it's popularity, probably because everyone is sick & tired of hearing about losing weight, exercising, stopping smoking or whatever needs to be addressed. Right now my private practice is very quiet, but come the 1st of the year, many will lift their weary heads from their sleeping pillows & stumble into my office.
Personally, I like beginning again. In fact, I tend to practice "beginning" just about every day. There is really no need for a new resolution. It's more like an ongoing personal cleaning up or clearing out. If I look carefully, underneath the disorder I can sense my desire & willingness to pick up where I left off.
Through the years I've been able to set a gentler, friendlier restart button. Perhaps it's because I avoid the resolution word & hype, so the fear of being criticized for failure or not achieving is less. After all, it's not a resolution or anything. It's simply something that was left unfinished & perhaps no one will even notice that I've restarted whatever it is.
Truth be known, very little gets finished in life.... at least in my life. For me that includes managing my weight, minimizing my pile of magazines, completing my writing assignments, my love for icing, or having my home dust free & the bathrooms completely clean. I'm so glad to know this because then now I can stop efforting & striving over so many things. Perhaps I can even begin enjoying them.
It's easy to see why I had spent a good part of my previous life bogged down, almost to the point of burnout. With my new definition, I am free to simply relax, picking up any challenge where I left it untended, no longer racked by shame or guilt. No need to hide anymore, from myself or the judging eyes of others. What a relief !
As a clinical hypnotherapist & writer, I'm geared to thinking within hypnotic metaphor. Here are some areas in my mind that had something to say to me this morning...
1. It's a good idea to put some things down for awhile. As I mentally walked through the areas of my life, noticing what was left unattended, I couldn't help but notice that some areas were doing better on their own since I left them alone. I'm not surprised, acknowledging that I have a tendency to beat things to death, or smother them with attention if they are not responding in the way I think best. Sometimes I can become breathless in the process, even if there is no aerobic activity involved. Talk about efforting !
2. There are 24 hours in a day & that includes eight that should be dedicated to sleep. No one gets more or less. I'm just like anyone else with owning too much to do. On the days I can't breathe I know I'm in trouble. For some deep & hidden reason, this a big learning curve for me.
I have some ideas about why this is, but what is truly important is waking up to it & getting practical. I don't have to look far to know what has to go. It's vital for me to be ruthless in my clearing & cleaning, not just with my possessions, but with the intangibles as well. This is never easy, but it is incredibly rewarding. Even throwing away socks with holes can seem like a break-through moment.
3. Choosing what is truly important to me can focus my mind. Just like cleaning & clearing is vital, so is deciding on exactly what I want. It's amazing that we can have so much of so many things & still not have what we want. How does this happen? For me, it's always been about not clearly defining what I want. In order to do this, it's necessary to truly slow down, to clear, to be still & then to begin to define. When I work with myself I utilize automatic writing. For my patients, it's easy to go into the workshop of the mind with guided imagery, enter the metaphor, perhaps shopping for the details. In both scenarios, the subconscious mind joins in the creative goal building & then sets a plan of action.
4. I can always be healthier. Eating correctly for my body needs, excercising, managing my addictions & a host of other areas can all benefit from beginning again. Exploring ways to do this always triggers additional areas to present themselves. This morning I was having a look at my nutritional areas when I heard from my skin department. When we become purposefully still, either in meditation, hypnosis or automatic writing, the messages begin to flow, but never in a way of becoming overwhelmed. The subconscious mind understands the need for balance or homeostasis & takes one towards that. If anxiety is in the way, it simply means that you have to release & go deeper down to pass that obstruction.
5. I don't have to be perfect. I just need to be present. Growing up in a critical household, I developed many automatic mind programs about the need for perfection. This was one of many that kept me locked in my personal prison for decades. For me, it is very important to begin the mangement of these automatic programs over & over again. This is how they weaken or diminish. Some of mine that could do with some refreshing or clear eyes include approval seeking & self-doubting. Do I have others? Of course I do. I'm human. But, once again the subconscious mind is kind & prefers balance. When we take the initiative to work in one area, the others will simply follow suit.
So, enjoy all the holidays....a perfect time for reflection & an opportunity to wake-up & enjoy the fresh air that surrounds new beginnings.
FROM THE AUTHOR
To help you along, here's a sample mp3 of a very popular program that I've written, recorded & produced called Affirmations for Inner Winning. This will give you a head start in working with your own subconscious mind in many new ways. This particular mp3 or CD has three tracks or sessions. You can order the entire program on my website.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Offerings for Publishers, Editors & Agents
Beyond Disorderly Eating...The Truth About Sugar & Bingeing & How to Stop
mindSCRABBLE...The Game of Programming Your Mind for What You Want
It's Time to Stop...Nail Biting - Book & Interactive Self-Hypnosis CD
Winning the Mind Game - A Total Sports Advantage - Book & Interactive Self-Hypnosis CD
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Ordering Disorder
"The art of progress is to preserve order amid change and to preserve change amid order." Alfred North Whitehead
Who would say "no" to progress? Truth be known, I know plenty of people who would & who do. Many are private patients of mine & while I might "tut-tut" at that & enjoy some good old finger-pointing, that very finger often turns around, pointing right back at me. As for the life-game of mindSCRABBLE, as I inwardly giggle at my own disorderly behaviors, my subconscious mind is busily mind-etching those even deeper.
If I was paid for cluttering, I'd be quite wealthy. Of course, I deny cluttering & as for hoarding.....well now, certainly not me.
My issues with all of this go back to early childhood. My father died when I was three & I learned to make every attempt to keep what was mine. This was my little attempt at building a secure life. While it does help to know the origin of issues, it certainly doesn't diminish the decades of closet & drawer stuffing. I've become so good at this that I can clutter just about anywhere & with just about anything. Yes....I would be quite wealthy.
I've learned that letting go is a good thing & so I go through emptying & releasing episodes. My main reasoning is that I've come to realize that prosperity doesn't flow into cluttered space, so I must release if I choose to prosper. It also helps to find things. Just the process of clearing is creative & it never surprises me what catalysts sit in that last bulging file.
Ordering disorder is a very emotional experience for me. I truly have issues with letting go & today I decided to write about these, instead of just noticing them. It is true that my things do bring me joy. I love all sorts of things including my scraps of paper. So, is there something wrong with that? After all, I'm basically a good person. Just because I feel connected to scraps of paper, does that make me a loser of sorts. Of course not, I tell myself. Don't be so dramatic.
I do want to be able to let go & release with more ease. I've noticed that whenever I go through periods of cleaning, clearing & letting go, that it does become easier. In fact, it actually begets itself. So, I guess the goal needs to be to practice more often. Is it possible that I might actually become good at this & even learn to like it?
AFFIRMATION FOR TODAY
"I choose to see my disorder clearly & then I choose what to order first."...Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
Who would say "no" to progress? Truth be known, I know plenty of people who would & who do. Many are private patients of mine & while I might "tut-tut" at that & enjoy some good old finger-pointing, that very finger often turns around, pointing right back at me. As for the life-game of mindSCRABBLE, as I inwardly giggle at my own disorderly behaviors, my subconscious mind is busily mind-etching those even deeper.
If I was paid for cluttering, I'd be quite wealthy. Of course, I deny cluttering & as for hoarding.....well now, certainly not me.
My issues with all of this go back to early childhood. My father died when I was three & I learned to make every attempt to keep what was mine. This was my little attempt at building a secure life. While it does help to know the origin of issues, it certainly doesn't diminish the decades of closet & drawer stuffing. I've become so good at this that I can clutter just about anywhere & with just about anything. Yes....I would be quite wealthy.
I've learned that letting go is a good thing & so I go through emptying & releasing episodes. My main reasoning is that I've come to realize that prosperity doesn't flow into cluttered space, so I must release if I choose to prosper. It also helps to find things. Just the process of clearing is creative & it never surprises me what catalysts sit in that last bulging file.
Ordering disorder is a very emotional experience for me. I truly have issues with letting go & today I decided to write about these, instead of just noticing them. It is true that my things do bring me joy. I love all sorts of things including my scraps of paper. So, is there something wrong with that? After all, I'm basically a good person. Just because I feel connected to scraps of paper, does that make me a loser of sorts. Of course not, I tell myself. Don't be so dramatic.
I do want to be able to let go & release with more ease. I've noticed that whenever I go through periods of cleaning, clearing & letting go, that it does become easier. In fact, it actually begets itself. So, I guess the goal needs to be to practice more often. Is it possible that I might actually become good at this & even learn to like it?
AFFIRMATION FOR TODAY
"I choose to see my disorder clearly & then I choose what to order first."...Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Inside My Critical Nature & Being
"Blessed is the man who can take bricks thrown at him & build a sound foundation"....Tom Pryor
Related SpokenWords, Thoughts & Emotional MindState - captious, carping, caviling, cavillous, censorious, critic, faultfinding, hypercritical, overcritical, discerning, discriminating, penetrating; finicky, fussy, particular; belittling, demeaning, disparaging, humbling, lowering.
Over the past few days I found myself journaling about criticism that tend to initiate conflicts...self-delivered & delivered by others. I learned from one of my patients that Gemini was in retrograde or something like that, meaning that communication is off. Of course this made me feel better immediately, knowing I had little to do with all the criticism floating around me.
Automatic writing or journaling is very helpful for me personally & I often recommend it to my patients as well, even if they balk about writing. The balking is usually fear-related. Yes, writing is committing ink to paper....or at least it was in the past. I still journal with real paper & pen. It helps to slow the mind down, allowing the images or ideas to form.
After so many years of working in this field, I'm still amazed at how the subconscious mind will cooperate with emotional reframing & healing. Sometimes all I really need is a good metaphor to manage my heavy-air days.
As I broached the subject of critical words, here are some things that came off of my pen....delivered directly from my subconscious mind.
1. Criticism can be a good thing, even if the person delivering it does not mean it as such.....myself included. Of course we are our biggest critic. That's no secret. I'm also well aware of constructive vs destructive criticism. However, I often have a problem with accepting the term constructive criticism, especially when it is delivered in what appears to be a destructive way. Or, is this just a matter of Gemini in retrograde?
2. It doesn't really matter if the criticism is constructive or destructive, nor if Gemini is having a problem or not. I can benefit from all of it... & if there is plenty of it around, it follows that I would could have a wealth of benefits, if I just did what I needed to do. Hmmm....
3. The subconscious mind often connects things in strange ways in order to make it's point. I was brought back to my time of nursing in Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center & to the memory of debriding wounds. Wounds cannot heal properly until the dead or infected tissue is removed, often speck by speck. The job of the wound care nurse is to utilize different techniques to achieve this. However, it cannot be done all at once. It is a process, sometimes taking months, depending on the depth or complexity of the wound. The metaphor is forming....
4. Emotional wounds are similar to physical ones. They must also be debrided. Criticism is like pouring acid into certain emotional wounds. Anyone who has experienced this phenomena is certainly familiar with the combination of physical & emotional pain that results. I know that I am....
5. Many of us were born into a very critical environments, thus making us highly sensitive to critical words. Simple words, even if delivered in a constructive way, can be very frightening & debilitating. As a child I had no power & had to develop ways to survive this type of environment, but as an adult I do have power & so it is my responsibility to debride mywounds so I can heal & continue my self-growth.
6. Managing stress is not the same as debriding wounds. While it is very important to eat correctly, meditate, exercise & practice mindfulness, if I truly want to heal & manage my emotions at higher levels, I must be willing to cleanse & debride my wounds.
7. Emotional wounds are debrided through awareness & timely releasing. When criticism is painful, there is a wound that needs to be cleaned. The process is simple, but not always easy. I remember that when treating a patient's wound, I'd often tell them, Yes, it hurts & no, it won't hurt forever. I remember....the patient learns to bring his/her attention to the breath & to ride it, just like riding gentle waves in the sea. The physical pain begins to move to the side & then diminishes. The patient learns to see/sense the wound healing from the bottom up.
8. The same holds true for emotional healing. As the wound heals from the bottom up, the mind will often send fragments of the debris. These may be in the form of old memories or emotions that need to be released. Opening & healing is now in process...
More About Criticism & Connected Conflicts...
There are other things that are helpful for me to remember. First off the bat, conflicts & criticism are inevitable, as long as I'm willing or interested in standing up for what I believe are my rights or beliefs.
It does help to simply the actual word conflict or criticism. The subconscious meaning of words can be so powerful as to disallow any scrutiny because of the attached, automatic mind fear patterns. Conflicts are simply two sets of demands, goals or motives that appear to be incompatible. I must remind myself that I deal with conflicts all day long. Some might be small & I may not even label these as conflicts, but they are nevertheless. This is a very important awareness because as I view them under the conflict or criticism label, I'll come to know that I have been developing excellent resolution skills for a very long time, some actually from early childhood.
Conflicts & accompanying criticisms come in sizes including small, medium & large. Some are more uncomfortable than others. The more uncomfortable tend to be connected to deeper wounds or more sensitive areas in the subconscious mind. Keep in mind that these are very valuable as debriding tools.
The conflicts or critiques I play in the theater of my mind tend to be more frequent & often larger. It's important for me not to forget that these also effect my body physiology & bring more debris to old, deep wounds. Engaging the thought process in awfulizing is a very bad habit & one that can have serious physical & emotional consequences.
This happens to be one of my habits & so I've asked my own subconscious mind to wake me when I'm doing this, so I have the opportunity to break the habit & release the stress. At the same time, I'll take advantage of the self-criticism & do a very more steps to debride any old wounds.
Simple Metaphors for Managing Criticisms...
Here's one I utilize for myself quite often. When someone is critical of me, I change those words in my mind. They are critical of something I've done. This simply means that we have a difference of opinion about this something. That is easier for me to accept & curbs the production of stress chemicals. Remember, I was born into a very critical environment, so I am very sensitive.
Next, in the theater of my mind, I take the "something" & rinse it off under my very beautiful golden faucet. I want to remove the emotional component that was part of the delivery. This way, I am free to examine the "something" & decide if I want to change anything about my part or my beliefs. I may do this immediately, or decide to wait. Then, I might simply thank the other person for bringing this to my attention & to let them know that I'll think about it. This moves me out of a defensive position, into one of maturity & self-control.
Related SpokenWords, Thoughts & Emotional MindState - captious, carping, caviling, cavillous, censorious, critic, faultfinding, hypercritical, overcritical, discerning, discriminating, penetrating; finicky, fussy, particular; belittling, demeaning, disparaging, humbling, lowering.
Over the past few days I found myself journaling about criticism that tend to initiate conflicts...self-delivered & delivered by others. I learned from one of my patients that Gemini was in retrograde or something like that, meaning that communication is off. Of course this made me feel better immediately, knowing I had little to do with all the criticism floating around me.
Automatic writing or journaling is very helpful for me personally & I often recommend it to my patients as well, even if they balk about writing. The balking is usually fear-related. Yes, writing is committing ink to paper....or at least it was in the past. I still journal with real paper & pen. It helps to slow the mind down, allowing the images or ideas to form.
After so many years of working in this field, I'm still amazed at how the subconscious mind will cooperate with emotional reframing & healing. Sometimes all I really need is a good metaphor to manage my heavy-air days.
As I broached the subject of critical words, here are some things that came off of my pen....delivered directly from my subconscious mind.
1. Criticism can be a good thing, even if the person delivering it does not mean it as such.....myself included. Of course we are our biggest critic. That's no secret. I'm also well aware of constructive vs destructive criticism. However, I often have a problem with accepting the term constructive criticism, especially when it is delivered in what appears to be a destructive way. Or, is this just a matter of Gemini in retrograde?
2. It doesn't really matter if the criticism is constructive or destructive, nor if Gemini is having a problem or not. I can benefit from all of it... & if there is plenty of it around, it follows that I would could have a wealth of benefits, if I just did what I needed to do. Hmmm....
3. The subconscious mind often connects things in strange ways in order to make it's point. I was brought back to my time of nursing in Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center & to the memory of debriding wounds. Wounds cannot heal properly until the dead or infected tissue is removed, often speck by speck. The job of the wound care nurse is to utilize different techniques to achieve this. However, it cannot be done all at once. It is a process, sometimes taking months, depending on the depth or complexity of the wound. The metaphor is forming....
4. Emotional wounds are similar to physical ones. They must also be debrided. Criticism is like pouring acid into certain emotional wounds. Anyone who has experienced this phenomena is certainly familiar with the combination of physical & emotional pain that results. I know that I am....
5. Many of us were born into a very critical environments, thus making us highly sensitive to critical words. Simple words, even if delivered in a constructive way, can be very frightening & debilitating. As a child I had no power & had to develop ways to survive this type of environment, but as an adult I do have power & so it is my responsibility to debride mywounds so I can heal & continue my self-growth.
6. Managing stress is not the same as debriding wounds. While it is very important to eat correctly, meditate, exercise & practice mindfulness, if I truly want to heal & manage my emotions at higher levels, I must be willing to cleanse & debride my wounds.
7. Emotional wounds are debrided through awareness & timely releasing. When criticism is painful, there is a wound that needs to be cleaned. The process is simple, but not always easy. I remember that when treating a patient's wound, I'd often tell them, Yes, it hurts & no, it won't hurt forever. I remember....the patient learns to bring his/her attention to the breath & to ride it, just like riding gentle waves in the sea. The physical pain begins to move to the side & then diminishes. The patient learns to see/sense the wound healing from the bottom up.
8. The same holds true for emotional healing. As the wound heals from the bottom up, the mind will often send fragments of the debris. These may be in the form of old memories or emotions that need to be released. Opening & healing is now in process...
More About Criticism & Connected Conflicts...
There are other things that are helpful for me to remember. First off the bat, conflicts & criticism are inevitable, as long as I'm willing or interested in standing up for what I believe are my rights or beliefs.
It does help to simply the actual word conflict or criticism. The subconscious meaning of words can be so powerful as to disallow any scrutiny because of the attached, automatic mind fear patterns. Conflicts are simply two sets of demands, goals or motives that appear to be incompatible. I must remind myself that I deal with conflicts all day long. Some might be small & I may not even label these as conflicts, but they are nevertheless. This is a very important awareness because as I view them under the conflict or criticism label, I'll come to know that I have been developing excellent resolution skills for a very long time, some actually from early childhood.
Conflicts & accompanying criticisms come in sizes including small, medium & large. Some are more uncomfortable than others. The more uncomfortable tend to be connected to deeper wounds or more sensitive areas in the subconscious mind. Keep in mind that these are very valuable as debriding tools.
The conflicts or critiques I play in the theater of my mind tend to be more frequent & often larger. It's important for me not to forget that these also effect my body physiology & bring more debris to old, deep wounds. Engaging the thought process in awfulizing is a very bad habit & one that can have serious physical & emotional consequences.
This happens to be one of my habits & so I've asked my own subconscious mind to wake me when I'm doing this, so I have the opportunity to break the habit & release the stress. At the same time, I'll take advantage of the self-criticism & do a very more steps to debride any old wounds.
Simple Metaphors for Managing Criticisms...
Here's one I utilize for myself quite often. When someone is critical of me, I change those words in my mind. They are critical of something I've done. This simply means that we have a difference of opinion about this something. That is easier for me to accept & curbs the production of stress chemicals. Remember, I was born into a very critical environment, so I am very sensitive.
Next, in the theater of my mind, I take the "something" & rinse it off under my very beautiful golden faucet. I want to remove the emotional component that was part of the delivery. This way, I am free to examine the "something" & decide if I want to change anything about my part or my beliefs. I may do this immediately, or decide to wait. Then, I might simply thank the other person for bringing this to my attention & to let them know that I'll think about it. This moves me out of a defensive position, into one of maturity & self-control.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Working Through Self-Anxiety
"You can turn the tide of your life from negative to positive results through your constructive words"...Winston Churchill
Related SpokenWords, Thoughts, Emotions, Mind-States - panic, concern, concernment, disquiet, disquietude, solicitude, unease, uneasiness, worry, doubt, mistrust, dread, uncertainty; distress, misery, suffering; dread;
Oh....where to begin on the subject of anxiety. Why do I feel that I must write about this today? This morning I was doing some automatic journaling for myself & my own anxiety issues came off the end of my pen, completely uninvited, but obviously wanting to roost on my desk. After writing yesterday's blog on the theme of the day, I couldn't help but hope that anxiety was not going to be today's theme.
Since I've been practicing automatic journaling for decades now, I know to trust it & that means to just go with the flow without judging or fear. For those of you who aren't familiar with this type of journaling, I suggest that you give it a whirl. It's quite simple. Open a new journal or notebook that is dedicated to this task only. I use a spiral notebook......I actually have two sizes, one 5 by 8.5 & the other 8.5 by 11. I prefer to write in the larger one because there is more space, but sometimes I like to pop the smaller one in my briefcase & take it on the road with me.
To help you along, here's a sample mp3 of a very popular program that I've written, recorded & produced called Automatic Writing. This will give you a head start in working with your own subconscious mind in many new ways. This particular mp3 or CD has three tracks or sessions. You can order the entire program on my website.
When working daily with Automatic Writing, put a decent amount of time aside for yourself. For me, that means at least 15 minutes & preferably more like 30. Sometimes I'll get to the office a bit early, specifically for this purpose. Next....open the journal & have your pen ready. Don't use the computer for this. The mind will gift more to you if you put the pen to paper. Relax deeply, just for a few minutes. I call this settling in..........& then begin to write.
Don't be concerned about sentence structure, grammar, etc. Just let the pen flow. Write whatever comes. Stay out of judgment. If the mind sends ramblings, so be it. Write them.... & if nothing comes, write that as well. Keep going for the length of time you have decided to write or fill the amount of space you have decided to fill. Keep to the discipline. And once you have finished, put it away.
Here are some journal entries of mine from today - see how many themes you can spot. Look beyond the obvious. Remember, this is coming directly from my own subconscious mind. Also, look for the affirmations; the positive mind programs that were given to me through the end of my pen.
Changes in the wind. Patients leaving. Wondering where this will leave me. Remembering the other big change time after my mother died. I had next to no professional practice. The phones were quiet. My emotions ran away with me...fear...not knowing what to do. I was gifted that time with the idea to design audio programs. That came on the rear of a tear. Here I am once again....but it is not quite the same. Life has not been static. I have things to do & places to go. I'm busy. New patients are coming. I'm satisfied. Book ideas are coming. I'm challenged. It's time for something new. The nail biting book will be ready soon. It appears unfinished, but it isn't. Putting my ducks in a row. Organizing things that don't invite organizing, like relationships & my decision to change my soap. I need something new, perhaps the seminars that came to me while in Spain.............
My first patient arrived. I've been seeing her for over four years. She was only fourteen when she first walked into my office. She sat in the pink chair & hid behind her hands. She only weighed 90 pounds. I've known her at 65 pounds & now, while she is only 102 pounds, she is different. She leaves for college next week. I'll miss her tremendously, just like a daughter. I even tear as I write this.
She's very anxious about so many aspects of college. Her parents are anxious, imaging all the worst. It's been more than four anxiety-filled years for them & they are rightfully frightened. But today she sits before me & we discuss her dorm-room decor & her new room-mate who is coming with the refrigerator. Simple, but important things to a girl who has made such a journey.
Changes & anxiety coupled together. Fear of the known & unknown. Fleeting little thoughts having the power to turn our blood to ice, often not understood by others who might even laugh at our dilemma. Babies....oh grow up ! Feelings of walking alone on new paths, excited but frightened just the same. Our thoughts connecting up with other past experiences, some good & others not so good. What kinds of memories will we be making? Oh, why can't things just stay as they are, even if they aren't very good? At least they are familiar!
Here are some things my young patient & I did today...
1. Anxiety & excitement are very close in their chemical composition. What's important here is the labeling. It only takes 1/200th of a second to change the label from a fear state, to a positive exciting state.
2. You have the choice & the power to diminish all fears & all thoughts that are fear-related. Take out your re-framing tools or use the pie-cutter. The latter is a releasing tool for diminishing a portion of a fear or anxiety that may present itself as too big to manage.
3. Emotions are like children that wear tee-shirts with their names on the front. You are not your emotions, but you are in charge of them. You have the choice & the power to diminish any & all emotions that are not benefiting you & you have the choice & the power to invite in or enhance any & all emotions that do benefit you. Remember to keep your eye on your mind-assets & utilize them to their fullest. Don't let them get rusty from disuse!
4. Managing yourself & your life is fun! The better you get at a task, the better for you in the long-run. This is how champions are made. If you feel the desire to run & hide behind an old, impotent behavior pattern, wake-up & come forward instead. Meet the bully-factor & disassemble it. Observe it losing power as you gain power. Pay attention to the power of your mindWORDS. They are all coated with chemicals that change the outcomes of your entire mind & body. The more positive-task-orientated you are, the more power you will harvest.
AFFIRMATION PLANT
"My thoughts & emotions are things that can be managed. I am not my thoughts, nor my emotions. I have power over the workings of my mind & body". ...Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
Related SpokenWords, Thoughts, Emotions, Mind-States - panic, concern, concernment, disquiet, disquietude, solicitude, unease, uneasiness, worry, doubt, mistrust, dread, uncertainty; distress, misery, suffering; dread;
Oh....where to begin on the subject of anxiety. Why do I feel that I must write about this today? This morning I was doing some automatic journaling for myself & my own anxiety issues came off the end of my pen, completely uninvited, but obviously wanting to roost on my desk. After writing yesterday's blog on the theme of the day, I couldn't help but hope that anxiety was not going to be today's theme.
Since I've been practicing automatic journaling for decades now, I know to trust it & that means to just go with the flow without judging or fear. For those of you who aren't familiar with this type of journaling, I suggest that you give it a whirl. It's quite simple. Open a new journal or notebook that is dedicated to this task only. I use a spiral notebook......I actually have two sizes, one 5 by 8.5 & the other 8.5 by 11. I prefer to write in the larger one because there is more space, but sometimes I like to pop the smaller one in my briefcase & take it on the road with me.
To help you along, here's a sample mp3 of a very popular program that I've written, recorded & produced called Automatic Writing. This will give you a head start in working with your own subconscious mind in many new ways. This particular mp3 or CD has three tracks or sessions. You can order the entire program on my website.
When working daily with Automatic Writing, put a decent amount of time aside for yourself. For me, that means at least 15 minutes & preferably more like 30. Sometimes I'll get to the office a bit early, specifically for this purpose. Next....open the journal & have your pen ready. Don't use the computer for this. The mind will gift more to you if you put the pen to paper. Relax deeply, just for a few minutes. I call this settling in..........& then begin to write.
Don't be concerned about sentence structure, grammar, etc. Just let the pen flow. Write whatever comes. Stay out of judgment. If the mind sends ramblings, so be it. Write them.... & if nothing comes, write that as well. Keep going for the length of time you have decided to write or fill the amount of space you have decided to fill. Keep to the discipline. And once you have finished, put it away.
Here are some journal entries of mine from today - see how many themes you can spot. Look beyond the obvious. Remember, this is coming directly from my own subconscious mind. Also, look for the affirmations; the positive mind programs that were given to me through the end of my pen.
Changes in the wind. Patients leaving. Wondering where this will leave me. Remembering the other big change time after my mother died. I had next to no professional practice. The phones were quiet. My emotions ran away with me...fear...not knowing what to do. I was gifted that time with the idea to design audio programs. That came on the rear of a tear. Here I am once again....but it is not quite the same. Life has not been static. I have things to do & places to go. I'm busy. New patients are coming. I'm satisfied. Book ideas are coming. I'm challenged. It's time for something new. The nail biting book will be ready soon. It appears unfinished, but it isn't. Putting my ducks in a row. Organizing things that don't invite organizing, like relationships & my decision to change my soap. I need something new, perhaps the seminars that came to me while in Spain.............
My first patient arrived. I've been seeing her for over four years. She was only fourteen when she first walked into my office. She sat in the pink chair & hid behind her hands. She only weighed 90 pounds. I've known her at 65 pounds & now, while she is only 102 pounds, she is different. She leaves for college next week. I'll miss her tremendously, just like a daughter. I even tear as I write this.
She's very anxious about so many aspects of college. Her parents are anxious, imaging all the worst. It's been more than four anxiety-filled years for them & they are rightfully frightened. But today she sits before me & we discuss her dorm-room decor & her new room-mate who is coming with the refrigerator. Simple, but important things to a girl who has made such a journey.
Changes & anxiety coupled together. Fear of the known & unknown. Fleeting little thoughts having the power to turn our blood to ice, often not understood by others who might even laugh at our dilemma. Babies....oh grow up ! Feelings of walking alone on new paths, excited but frightened just the same. Our thoughts connecting up with other past experiences, some good & others not so good. What kinds of memories will we be making? Oh, why can't things just stay as they are, even if they aren't very good? At least they are familiar!
Here are some things my young patient & I did today...
1. Anxiety & excitement are very close in their chemical composition. What's important here is the labeling. It only takes 1/200th of a second to change the label from a fear state, to a positive exciting state.
2. You have the choice & the power to diminish all fears & all thoughts that are fear-related. Take out your re-framing tools or use the pie-cutter. The latter is a releasing tool for diminishing a portion of a fear or anxiety that may present itself as too big to manage.
3. Emotions are like children that wear tee-shirts with their names on the front. You are not your emotions, but you are in charge of them. You have the choice & the power to diminish any & all emotions that are not benefiting you & you have the choice & the power to invite in or enhance any & all emotions that do benefit you. Remember to keep your eye on your mind-assets & utilize them to their fullest. Don't let them get rusty from disuse!
4. Managing yourself & your life is fun! The better you get at a task, the better for you in the long-run. This is how champions are made. If you feel the desire to run & hide behind an old, impotent behavior pattern, wake-up & come forward instead. Meet the bully-factor & disassemble it. Observe it losing power as you gain power. Pay attention to the power of your mindWORDS. They are all coated with chemicals that change the outcomes of your entire mind & body. The more positive-task-orientated you are, the more power you will harvest.
AFFIRMATION PLANT
"My thoughts & emotions are things that can be managed. I am not my thoughts, nor my emotions. I have power over the workings of my mind & body". ...Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Self-Discipline....Where Art Thou?
"Life is tons of discipline"...Robert Frost
Related Words, Thoughts, Emotions & Mind-Sets - self-will, self-command, self-control, self-government, self-mastery, self-restraint, willpower
'Tis the season of lost discipline & so this is a good moment to bring the mind back to where it needs to live, that is if we want to reap the rewards of health & high level achieving. It's not just the Christmas cookies or the compulsive shopping or the excess alcohol.....it's the problem of entertaining a weak mind & then finding out that this crazy guest doesn't want to leave.
We all know about self-discipline....or do we? I know we are familiar with the term & probably can even define it, but when it comes to the application, the meaning of self-discipline seems to evade most of us. Some of my patients refuse to acknowledge that they have any self-discipline at all........as if accepting that fact would mean that they should/could have it in any & all areas of their life! Others refuse to mouth the word, as if it were poison or a jailer of life. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Let's review normal for a moment. While it's true that each of us is certainly disciplined in certain areas of life, no one has it across the board. So, why should we care about this? Well, it's actually quite important to realize that if you are disciplined in a particular area of your life, you can utilize that discipline subconsciously by applying it to another area where you may need more of it.
Most people who come to my private practice are seeking magic. In a way, it's so pleasingly child-like to share conversations with them, but on the other hand, one would think that by the time one reaches adult-hood we would be able to separate fantasy from reality. I've come to the conclusion that just about all of us, myself included, hold out hope for the manifestation of our very own wizard.
The most difficult part of my work is to break the magic spell & introduce the truths about self-discipline & wake people up to what they already have in place. I usually have to work quite hard to make this sale to my patients. It's so hard to let go of the wizard. It's sad in a way, because the truth is that self-discipline is actually very enjoyable.
If we weren't disciplined in so many areas, life would be a horrendous daily struggle. Think of some areas of your own life where you are disciplined. How about getting up in the morning, having breakfast, organizing your clothes & papers for work, brushing your teeth, organizing your home, etc. More than likely you have more disciplined areas than non-disciplined ones & this is good news.
Take a moment to think of some areas in your own life that you would like to bring over to the disciplined column. A few of mine include my exercise program, my book writing & weeding the garden. Just identifying these puts the subconscious mind on notice & a motivational plan is already in the works. That's the power of Interactive Awareness & Self-hypnosis.
We tend to plant negative motivational programs quite easily. Sometimes we aren't even aware that we are doing so. Here's an example....For some reason the term self-discipline receives a bad rap & a negative motivational code. Just saying it can scare people into the corner. This is irrational because self-discipline actually makes life easier.
My job as a clinical hypnotherapistis to gently bring my patients out of hiding & onto the particular goal path that needs the discipline. Once in motion, they will see & sense that this path is already lined with all sorts of motivational images & affirmations.
Most people think about self-hypnosis in relation to developing self-discipline to stop smoking or to lose weight. This is like saying that a fork is only used to eat meat or salad. There are actually hundreds of applications for self-hypnosis from medicine to sports to self-development & then some.
You know the old saying, it's all in how you look at something. In the practice of self-hypnosis, Self-discipline is a KEY MINDSET. In actuality it is a MASTER KEY MINDSETto success & high level achievement, as well as high level health. And so, we applaud this MINDSET right from the get-go. In the practice of interactive self-hypnosis we develop a new self-profile of success, as well as a strong sense of purpose.
While words are the tools of the hypnotherapist, the words form images that are emotionally fired. It's rather like relaxing deeply & then walking into the new self-profile & experiencing the many aspects of it. An experienced hypnotherapist can truly design an extraordinary experience that will/can program the subconscious mind in hundreds of ways. And while a picture paints a thousand words, a self-hypnotic image paints a thousand subconsicous mind suggestions.
Here are some self-discipline suggestions I planted today. Some were for patients & others were for myself...
1. Weight Loss - the images that my patient needed to experience were all about ordering her new discipline, as well as being comfortable & happy with this for many calendar months. In the past she had failed simply because of her disorder & lack of discipline.
2. Exercise Program - I visited myself in my mind's eye & positively experienced the full hour on the treadmill. I also experienced increased endurance on my weight circuit. I removed some negative-based emotional states that don't enjoy being in the gym & brought in my fun-self. I also removed the clocks that interfere with my discipline by telling me to hurry-up.
3. Lifestyle Changes - this patient needs to make a series of changes due to a serious medical diagnosis. This includes stopping smoking, losing weight & exercising. This is over-whelming for the patient & adds to the fear around the diagnosis. The images designed for her were very gentle, rather like kindergarten. New beginnings....building the different disciplines easily, playing with their parts. The patient became the student of the disciplines & sensed her own enjoyment at putting them together.
Spend some time thinking about your own issues now & allow your own subconscious mind to send up some suggestions. Just reading this material is enough to stimulate that happening.
PLANT AN AFFIRMATION
"I enjoy building disciplines in my life. I easily see/sense areas that would benefit from this KEY MINDSET & provide it for myself." ...Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
Related Words, Thoughts, Emotions & Mind-Sets - self-will, self-command, self-control, self-government, self-mastery, self-restraint, willpower
'Tis the season of lost discipline & so this is a good moment to bring the mind back to where it needs to live, that is if we want to reap the rewards of health & high level achieving. It's not just the Christmas cookies or the compulsive shopping or the excess alcohol.....it's the problem of entertaining a weak mind & then finding out that this crazy guest doesn't want to leave.
We all know about self-discipline....or do we? I know we are familiar with the term & probably can even define it, but when it comes to the application, the meaning of self-discipline seems to evade most of us. Some of my patients refuse to acknowledge that they have any self-discipline at all........as if accepting that fact would mean that they should/could have it in any & all areas of their life! Others refuse to mouth the word, as if it were poison or a jailer of life. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Let's review normal for a moment. While it's true that each of us is certainly disciplined in certain areas of life, no one has it across the board. So, why should we care about this? Well, it's actually quite important to realize that if you are disciplined in a particular area of your life, you can utilize that discipline subconsciously by applying it to another area where you may need more of it.
Most people who come to my private practice are seeking magic. In a way, it's so pleasingly child-like to share conversations with them, but on the other hand, one would think that by the time one reaches adult-hood we would be able to separate fantasy from reality. I've come to the conclusion that just about all of us, myself included, hold out hope for the manifestation of our very own wizard.
The most difficult part of my work is to break the magic spell & introduce the truths about self-discipline & wake people up to what they already have in place. I usually have to work quite hard to make this sale to my patients. It's so hard to let go of the wizard. It's sad in a way, because the truth is that self-discipline is actually very enjoyable.
If we weren't disciplined in so many areas, life would be a horrendous daily struggle. Think of some areas of your own life where you are disciplined. How about getting up in the morning, having breakfast, organizing your clothes & papers for work, brushing your teeth, organizing your home, etc. More than likely you have more disciplined areas than non-disciplined ones & this is good news.
Take a moment to think of some areas in your own life that you would like to bring over to the disciplined column. A few of mine include my exercise program, my book writing & weeding the garden. Just identifying these puts the subconscious mind on notice & a motivational plan is already in the works. That's the power of Interactive Awareness & Self-hypnosis.
We tend to plant negative motivational programs quite easily. Sometimes we aren't even aware that we are doing so. Here's an example....For some reason the term self-discipline receives a bad rap & a negative motivational code. Just saying it can scare people into the corner. This is irrational because self-discipline actually makes life easier.
My job as a clinical hypnotherapistis to gently bring my patients out of hiding & onto the particular goal path that needs the discipline. Once in motion, they will see & sense that this path is already lined with all sorts of motivational images & affirmations.
Most people think about self-hypnosis in relation to developing self-discipline to stop smoking or to lose weight. This is like saying that a fork is only used to eat meat or salad. There are actually hundreds of applications for self-hypnosis from medicine to sports to self-development & then some.
You know the old saying, it's all in how you look at something. In the practice of self-hypnosis, Self-discipline is a KEY MINDSET. In actuality it is a MASTER KEY MINDSETto success & high level achievement, as well as high level health. And so, we applaud this MINDSET right from the get-go. In the practice of interactive self-hypnosis we develop a new self-profile of success, as well as a strong sense of purpose.
While words are the tools of the hypnotherapist, the words form images that are emotionally fired. It's rather like relaxing deeply & then walking into the new self-profile & experiencing the many aspects of it. An experienced hypnotherapist can truly design an extraordinary experience that will/can program the subconscious mind in hundreds of ways. And while a picture paints a thousand words, a self-hypnotic image paints a thousand subconsicous mind suggestions.
Here are some self-discipline suggestions I planted today. Some were for patients & others were for myself...
1. Weight Loss - the images that my patient needed to experience were all about ordering her new discipline, as well as being comfortable & happy with this for many calendar months. In the past she had failed simply because of her disorder & lack of discipline.
2. Exercise Program - I visited myself in my mind's eye & positively experienced the full hour on the treadmill. I also experienced increased endurance on my weight circuit. I removed some negative-based emotional states that don't enjoy being in the gym & brought in my fun-self. I also removed the clocks that interfere with my discipline by telling me to hurry-up.
3. Lifestyle Changes - this patient needs to make a series of changes due to a serious medical diagnosis. This includes stopping smoking, losing weight & exercising. This is over-whelming for the patient & adds to the fear around the diagnosis. The images designed for her were very gentle, rather like kindergarten. New beginnings....building the different disciplines easily, playing with their parts. The patient became the student of the disciplines & sensed her own enjoyment at putting them together.
Spend some time thinking about your own issues now & allow your own subconscious mind to send up some suggestions. Just reading this material is enough to stimulate that happening.
PLANT AN AFFIRMATION
"I enjoy building disciplines in my life. I easily see/sense areas that would benefit from this KEY MINDSET & provide it for myself." ...Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
Friday, December 14, 2007
The Realm of Heightened Creativity
"We cannot live only for ourselves. A thousand fibers connect us with our fellow men, and along those fibers as sympathetic threads, our actions run as causes, and they come back to us as effects"....Herman Melville
It's amazing what a fall or injury can do! For those of you who read my blog, you might remember that I fell off of my desk & injured my back. Last week I wondered if I would walk again. That thought truly bothered me, especially knowing what I know about the power of words, whether they be verbalized or in the form of thoughts. Luckily for me, I knew what to do & took care of it quite rapidly. My life work & passion is to teach others how to do this for themselves.
But, I want much more for them.
We each have our own realm of heightened creativity. It's like a special city or place on our map of life. It is here that we can actively move past pain & problems & then into our own passion or desires. For many of us the roads to this city are unknown or completely blocked by old business, low expectations or thoughts of impossibility......negative fiction. But no matter what happened in the past, we can all go there. I know ithis because I've not only experienced it personally, but over the many years that I've been in the practice of medical & personal development hypnosis, I've had the privilege to witness this road opening over & over again.
I went back to work last Tuesday, just for a short day. It didn't take me long to realize that I'd changed in some rather profound way. Let me share a bit of this with you, because it does have importance to the changes I am currently making.
When one practices hypnotherapy, it is always a different experience with each patient, for each patient is different. There may be twenty who want to lose weight or stop smoking, or improve their memory or reduce their stress...and while the problems appear to be quite general, the person behind the problem is always different, thereby making the problem different in each case.
Each of us has traveled a different road, collected different strengths & weaknesses that have etched a special effect on the generalized problem, rather like the problem had been soaked in an original marinade, perhaps for decades.
So Tuesday morning was like any other morning for me....but then a very strong & heightened creative part of me began conversing, not only with my patients, but with me. I don't know how much you as the reader know about hypnotherapy, but suggestions are usually designed "right in the moment" & come from the subconscious mind of the therapist. They are beautifully pin-pointed towards the specialized needs of the patient.
It happened that my Tuesday morning patients were all well-known to me & so I was progressing down their particular road when all of a sudden the focus shifted slightly. I found myself talking about unexpected accidents & the importance of the body & the mind being prepared to take on the healing from the position of an expert healer & not from the position of a victim.
There was more urgency in the suggestions....All victim thoughts needed to be recognized immediately & removed right then & there. There is no time ever for hanging out in victim stuff. The patient I was working with in that moment happens to be over-weight & has been meandering on her path towards wellness. In truth, she is going forward, but rather just drifting along in a slow sing-song rhythm.
As I re-organized her suggestions, I became intensly aware that I also meander in certain areas of my own life & certainly can get into my own victim thing. My writing & the producing of my CD programs is one of those areas. Over the years I've written & produced hundreds of programs in different genres to meet the needs of my patients & students. Whenever I send these out to mainstream publishers, editors or agents, I tend to hide behind rejections as if I'm guilty of something & then make excuses as to why I cannot find a publisher to market my work in bookstores, etc. as if this were the most important thing in my life......a true Sarah Bernhardt.
Unfortunately, or so I've been told, my work is not considered mainstream by many publishers, editors or agents....rather odd because I sell these very successfully from my website, in fact, all over the world.. I've been in my field for over 30 years & each day I communicate with hundreds of people who go to work each day, but suffer in their own silent jails. I have tremendous compassion for them, for while they are seen, they not truly seen or they are judged in a way that is unjust, perhaps even cruel.
Why does this happen & to so many? As I've studied this part of human behavior, I've come to realize that we are all so lost in our own lives, that we simply have no time or even desire to see the obvious in others. It can truly be a lonely world & because of this lonliness, small problems grow into big ones. These problems we can see & not only do we notice them, but we take the position of judge & jury...
We see fat people, anorexic people, compulsive & obsessive people, nail biters, skin pickers, hair pullers, emotionally weak or stressed out people, uncooperative people, alcoholics, smokers, poor performers, shy people, those who appear lazy & tend to sleep-walk through the day. We see people with latent talent who refuse to be motivated. We see frightened people, some who can't leave their homes & others who simply can't stand up & make a presentation at work. This is just a short list of what we can see if we bother to look.
While these problems & their solutions appear obvious to us as judge & jury, it is not as simple as that. There are underlying reasons for all of this & more. Much has to do with simply not knowing how to come out & face the problem, release it & then manage stress in a healthier fashion. These are things that should have been taught in childhod, but most of the time parents did not have the skills themselves & so there was little or nothing to pass on to the infant, child & teen. While sometimes psychotherapy is required, in many instances all that is needed is to uncover the blocks, bring the awareness free of emotion, release & then plant new images.
So, my work is to work as detective along with the problem-owner. Then we are ready to free the guilt & shame & enter the realm of heightened creativity. This is where the good stuff resides.
I've come to understand & accept that the large majority of professionals in the publishing field aren't familiar with exactly what I do because perhaps they have no reason to know this. I hope you don't misinterpret this. It is not an ego thing........it just the way it is.
Back to last Tuesday. Just as my weight management patient needed to take off her heavy shoes that were interfering with the speed of her travels, I realized that I must do the same. Can someone help me untie this knot in my shoelace?
It's amazing what a fall or injury can do! For those of you who read my blog, you might remember that I fell off of my desk & injured my back. Last week I wondered if I would walk again. That thought truly bothered me, especially knowing what I know about the power of words, whether they be verbalized or in the form of thoughts. Luckily for me, I knew what to do & took care of it quite rapidly. My life work & passion is to teach others how to do this for themselves.
But, I want much more for them.
We each have our own realm of heightened creativity. It's like a special city or place on our map of life. It is here that we can actively move past pain & problems & then into our own passion or desires. For many of us the roads to this city are unknown or completely blocked by old business, low expectations or thoughts of impossibility......negative fiction. But no matter what happened in the past, we can all go there. I know ithis because I've not only experienced it personally, but over the many years that I've been in the practice of medical & personal development hypnosis, I've had the privilege to witness this road opening over & over again.
I went back to work last Tuesday, just for a short day. It didn't take me long to realize that I'd changed in some rather profound way. Let me share a bit of this with you, because it does have importance to the changes I am currently making.
When one practices hypnotherapy, it is always a different experience with each patient, for each patient is different. There may be twenty who want to lose weight or stop smoking, or improve their memory or reduce their stress...and while the problems appear to be quite general, the person behind the problem is always different, thereby making the problem different in each case.
Each of us has traveled a different road, collected different strengths & weaknesses that have etched a special effect on the generalized problem, rather like the problem had been soaked in an original marinade, perhaps for decades.
So Tuesday morning was like any other morning for me....but then a very strong & heightened creative part of me began conversing, not only with my patients, but with me. I don't know how much you as the reader know about hypnotherapy, but suggestions are usually designed "right in the moment" & come from the subconscious mind of the therapist. They are beautifully pin-pointed towards the specialized needs of the patient.
It happened that my Tuesday morning patients were all well-known to me & so I was progressing down their particular road when all of a sudden the focus shifted slightly. I found myself talking about unexpected accidents & the importance of the body & the mind being prepared to take on the healing from the position of an expert healer & not from the position of a victim.
There was more urgency in the suggestions....All victim thoughts needed to be recognized immediately & removed right then & there. There is no time ever for hanging out in victim stuff. The patient I was working with in that moment happens to be over-weight & has been meandering on her path towards wellness. In truth, she is going forward, but rather just drifting along in a slow sing-song rhythm.
As I re-organized her suggestions, I became intensly aware that I also meander in certain areas of my own life & certainly can get into my own victim thing. My writing & the producing of my CD programs is one of those areas. Over the years I've written & produced hundreds of programs in different genres to meet the needs of my patients & students. Whenever I send these out to mainstream publishers, editors or agents, I tend to hide behind rejections as if I'm guilty of something & then make excuses as to why I cannot find a publisher to market my work in bookstores, etc. as if this were the most important thing in my life......a true Sarah Bernhardt.
Unfortunately, or so I've been told, my work is not considered mainstream by many publishers, editors or agents....rather odd because I sell these very successfully from my website, in fact, all over the world.. I've been in my field for over 30 years & each day I communicate with hundreds of people who go to work each day, but suffer in their own silent jails. I have tremendous compassion for them, for while they are seen, they not truly seen or they are judged in a way that is unjust, perhaps even cruel.
Why does this happen & to so many? As I've studied this part of human behavior, I've come to realize that we are all so lost in our own lives, that we simply have no time or even desire to see the obvious in others. It can truly be a lonely world & because of this lonliness, small problems grow into big ones. These problems we can see & not only do we notice them, but we take the position of judge & jury...
We see fat people, anorexic people, compulsive & obsessive people, nail biters, skin pickers, hair pullers, emotionally weak or stressed out people, uncooperative people, alcoholics, smokers, poor performers, shy people, those who appear lazy & tend to sleep-walk through the day. We see people with latent talent who refuse to be motivated. We see frightened people, some who can't leave their homes & others who simply can't stand up & make a presentation at work. This is just a short list of what we can see if we bother to look.
While these problems & their solutions appear obvious to us as judge & jury, it is not as simple as that. There are underlying reasons for all of this & more. Much has to do with simply not knowing how to come out & face the problem, release it & then manage stress in a healthier fashion. These are things that should have been taught in childhod, but most of the time parents did not have the skills themselves & so there was little or nothing to pass on to the infant, child & teen. While sometimes psychotherapy is required, in many instances all that is needed is to uncover the blocks, bring the awareness free of emotion, release & then plant new images.
So, my work is to work as detective along with the problem-owner. Then we are ready to free the guilt & shame & enter the realm of heightened creativity. This is where the good stuff resides.
I've come to understand & accept that the large majority of professionals in the publishing field aren't familiar with exactly what I do because perhaps they have no reason to know this. I hope you don't misinterpret this. It is not an ego thing........it just the way it is.
Back to last Tuesday. Just as my weight management patient needed to take off her heavy shoes that were interfering with the speed of her travels, I realized that I must do the same. Can someone help me untie this knot in my shoelace?
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