Thursday, September 20, 2007
Life University - Teachers & Students
"Your attitude is your personal radar system. What signals are you currently sending out? If you think that this moment doesn't matter.....think again."....Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
I've mentioned before that we are teachers & students at the same time. Our most important lessons are learned from listening, as others share their life experiences, as they look for help from others. The "other", may or may not be the Workshop teacher. In fact, the "other" may be you.
I'm 38 years old & work in television production with a major network. I'm over-weight & extremely stressed out. I bite my nails & pull my hair when I'm nervous, which is most of the time. I've tried artificial nails, but I pick those off as well, so I spend quite a bit of energy hiding my hands, as they are a true embarrassment to me, especially in my profession. Why can't I stop this?
I know that I drink too much coffee, have a terrible diet & on weekends, I find myself drinking too much. I've thought about this & think it is because I'm trying to fit in all of my relaxation on the weekends, so anything goes. I do feel entitled because I don't have a minute to myself during the week. I am married, have two school-age children who are already over-extended in activities, making my life even worse because of the time constraints. But, what's a mom to do? I'm sure that I sound like every other working parent, making me feel guilty for even complaining.
Here's the frightening part. I truly don't feel well physically. I'm fatigued & have frequent headaches. I truly do not remember the last time I felt well. I've had a medical check-up & the MD told me that he can't find any real problems. I am not fine & not even near to fine. This frightens me even more than having a diagnosis of something. Is that strange or what? I went to counseling & found it useless because, despite everything, I'm a fairly happy & successful person. I'm just not well.
I don't know how to start or where to start. I'm like a "messy desk". I don't seem to have the time, nor the inclination to straighten it out because what's the point. People keep putting more stuff on top of it. I can't win. I'm truly frightened that I will die from this level of stress, yet I can't seem to motivate myself out of this. My MD offered medications & I turned them down. I truly don't think they will solve any of this. I see this as a project that I must do myself. I have many other aspects of myself to share, but I don't know what it is that you need to know from me. I jusst know that I'm ready to do what it takes.
I'm 46 years old & in many ways happier than I have ever been in my life, but on the other hand, frightened by what I'm now realizing is ahead of me. I believe the images that tell me that great things are in store for me, but then I'm immediately over-whelmed. It's the same feeling as standing at the edge of a diving board for the first time, curling my toes over the edge, while trying to muster the courage to jump.
I met Elizabeth a few years ago when I was thinking about stopping smoking. After some discussion about my life, lifestyle & circumstances, I recognized that stopping smoking was not a priority for me. The heavy baggage from my childhood, bad relationships, poor decisions & an abusive husband, needed more immediate attention. I had just started in real estate & was trying to build a business while dealing with a very difficult & jealous husband. As I worked with Elizabeth, I learned to get to know myself, where my personal power was located & how I could access it at any moment.
Two years later I'm minus the bully who was my husband. That was my first task, the one that I implemented quickly. I left in secret with my two children, my dog & four cats. I had been able to save enough moeny to rent a small place, but moved with nothing else. It was the scariest, but most freeing move I have ever made.
On the first night in my newly rented house, I sat on the sleeping bag I had set up in my bedroom & wrote down my goals for the coming year. I gave myself a year to buy a home of my own, purchase a computer system for my business & to buy a car for my daughter. Each of these seemed insurmountable to me at the time, but I had gained self-insight, as well as the strength & power of my own mind.
I practiced the tools that Elizabeth had given to me; heightened awareness & positive imagery. There were days I doubted it was taking me anywhere, but I continued, remembering what I had already achieved. The year I had given myself had almost concluded. I had accomplished NONE of my written goals. But then, within the last month, everything just fell into place & with seemingly no effort on my part, I accomplished all three of my goals.....with 5 days to spare.
This brings me to where I am now. As I said, I'm happier than I have ever been in my whole life. But now that I've accomplished this, I see so much more in front of me, more than I could have ever imagined or dreamed about. I know it is real & that it awaits me. This is what scares me. I need to know what frightenes me. Once I know this I can carry on towards a fantastic future. So here I am. Ready to take it on.
THE IMPORTANCE OF HOT DESIRE
Claire & Jo have a lot to offer to themselves & to others. Looking first to Claire, it seems to me that her body is burning out from not getting what it needs. I'm impressed that despite being so busy & fatigued at the same time, she is willing to go right ahead with this Workshop. This says MUCH about her, telling me that she will experience success IF HER DESIRE IS "GUT-FELT" which I believe it is. Sometimes we need to get truly sick & tired before we are willing to become seriously involved with our own rehabilitation & self-growth.
This is usually my first important assessment factor when meeting a new patient/student, either in my office or in a Workshop. I want to see & sense their level of "wanting" or desire. I want to sense if they want me to do the work OR if they are wanting to do the work themselves. In my experience, those who have HOT desire & truly want to do their own work, despite any & all obstcles, will be huge winners. Those who are not willing usually have very different outcomes. So it is important for everyone studying in the Workshop to assess themselves in their desire & willingness to do their own work & to do it consistently. There is no magic fix. It is like training for an Olympic Medal, only this is for winning your life back, as well as keeping you out of trouble, both medically & emotionally.
Most people who come to the Workshop are seeking help for very specific desires. Common ones include losing weight or to stop smoking or drinking. Others want to manage anxiety, panic attacks, or want to stop biting their nails or pulling their hair. Students want to do better on tests & to stop being fearful when giving presentations before their class. On occasion, someone senses a glimmer of their potential, but they can't seem to grasp it, so as to know it better. Jo was & still is a vivid example of someone who can see her possibilities.
When I first met Jo, she simply wanted to stop smoking. It was obvious that she was managing her stress in this way. Excesses are always about something else, Jo being no different from anyone else. We all have a system for managing stress, most of them being unhealthy. In our next Workshop we'll get into the Stress Connection. You might be surprised as to what happens when you open yours.
The past issues of this blog can be found below. Other segments are stored in the following separate blog. For those of you who would like to practice Interactive Self-Hypnosis, there is always a complimentary mp3 sitting on my website. The program that is there presently is a full session called The Life University. This is part of a 2-CD/mp3 program for re-structuring goals & implementing them in all parts of life. I'm sure you will join others who have enjoyed working with this program. I'll be changing this in a few days, so you might want to take advantage of it while it is still posted. The next program will be on goal achievement.
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